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A first time mum at 39, trying not to let my son kill me off too soon. Busy juggling a new family, a new house and a tricky recording schedule I figured blogging would be less expensive than therapy and less embarrassing than shouting at rude and stupid people in the street/on trains/at the supermarket.

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Morning sickness moans

Sorry, I know it's not the nicest subject but I need to vent.

1) It's an urban myth that it's just in the beginning of a pregnancy.  I never had a trace of anything until after 12 weeks.  I'm now fast approaching 30 weeks and it's beginning to get worse.

2) It also doesn't have to involve the act of being sick.  It can just make you go through all the motions but with your efforts rewarded with nothing but a horrible tight-pulled-muscle feeling in your stomach and sides, watery eyes, the urge to pee and generally making you feel altogether crap.  This process can vary from 30 seconds to about 10 minutes and is pretty unpleasant. 

3) point 2 is only correct if you get the feeling first thing in the morning.  Clearly there is nothing to ...erm... produce ... shall we say, as you haven't eaten for 12 hours.  My third point is that 'morning sickness' is definitely not exclusive to mornings.  It can spring up at any time, usually if there is a strong smell of anything vaguely unpleasant in the air. 
Generally it's at rather inconvenient times, for instance, after a meal in a nice restaurant which results in you having to run to the ladies covering your mouth and, effectively, wasting the money you have just spent on a perfectly good lunch or dinner.

4) why do I never get 'morning sickness' at the weekends/when I get out of bed later than usual?  Why is it only when I get up for work at around 7am that I am plagued with such torture.  I'm pretty sure this has happened less than half a dozen times on a weekend or lie-in.

5) what is it about toothpaste that induces it? 

6) I'm pretty sure a bloke invented it. 

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